How I play videogames

Whenever I’ve watched or read about how people play games i realised I’m quite a weirdo in many ways when it comes to my play style no matter what I’m playing so i thought I’d explain some things that not many people do with non genre specific stuff first to make it easier.

1. Never doing the tutorial properly
While tutorials are obviously important they sometimes feel far too linear for my liking so i immediately try to break them. This goes from small things like merely ignoring what they say and pressing all the other buttons if its a move tutorial to crazy stuff like completing it in a dumb way. This may sound pointless but there’s a case when i broke a tutorial and another where i found a secret.

In Worms 3 (Android) i ‘broke’ the weapons tutorial as the thing it checks for is if the enemy worm dies, instead of using the only weapon aka the mine i instead repeatedly jumped from high places until i died killing the enemy with the explosion damage and thus winning it in the wrong way.

The secret i found is in the tutorial of Spiderman 2 on PS2 and its quite easy to get as well. Basically i noticed how you were enclosed in a small area so when i got up high i decided to see what would happen if you purposely jumped off and killed yourself, to my surprise the narrator reacted to dying in the tutorial, can’t fully remember what he says so if you have the game and a capture card please record it for me.

2. Explore Everything (including stuff you’re not meant to)
It doesn’t matter how linear a game i will always be searching for secrets and easter eggs sometimes looking at anything that looks remotely interesting like book names or silly stuff you probably should just ignore (I’ve probably flushed more toilets in videogames than everyone else lmao). I also don’t stop at merely searching what you’re given. If i can get out the map or really high up I’ll do it asap, after all this is one of the best ways to find easter eggs especially in the Halo Series.

A game that’s hilariously easy to escape from is Defiance with almost all the special moves helping in some way. The speed boost can help climbing up high when you need to jump further which allows you to reach the top of the hospital place on an island (forgot its name).

You can exploit the ability to switch with a decoy to escape the map whenever you want, all you do is squeeze in a corner where there’s an invisible wall so your decoy spawns on the other side and then swap. You can’t run forever though which is kinda sad.

Best thing though is if you can go to the blocked off area of Alcatraz, first climb the stairs, jump on the tree branch closest to the building and from there you can jump on the roof and simply walk past the fence. Last time i checked there was a small shed sized place with absolutely no textures whatsoever but its been ages since i played it.

3. Picking up and collecting absolutely everything
Sure hoarding is something alot of people do although I’m possibly I’m of the worst cases, i will pick up absolutely anything that you can whether it’s useless or not. Nothing will stop me either, i mean who knows when that piece of trash, random plate or some burnt food will be the key to saving the world (highly unlikely lol). The item doesn’t even need to be something that goes into an inventory because I’ll happily walk around levels or even across the game world holding something dumb like a chair or a corpse.

4. Never taking anything seriously
This one is similar to the first where I’ll purposely ignore things and just do what i want, this includes when NPC’s are desperately trying to remind me I need to save the world or something else much more important than the stuff i usually end up doing. For example i will throw stupid things at enemies if i can, especially if its possible to hurt them but simply annoying them is OK too. My play style is also what led me to finding out how to kill NPC’s in Assassins Creed 2 and get away with it for example. Another example would be Super Smash Bros Brawl, back when i owned it instead of always fighting head on I learnt to use the items like a master which includes things like killing opponents with non explosive capsules and pokeballs (by throwing it straight at them).

5. Controlled Button Mashing in Fighting Games
Because of my memory i am quite bad at most fighting games, the reason being you need combos and they’re usually impossible to pull off unless you remember them. However i don’t merely go crazy all over the controller like some people so but i do seem that way, while i may mash the buttons I actually do choose between kicks and punches as well as where i attack (there’s usually high, middle and low attacks) which somehow works. For example i won Tekken 1, 3, Tag Team, 5 and 6 with this (i haven’t won the others simply because i haven’t played them). In my opinion  there’s something oddly satisfying about suddenly pulling off an awesome combo out of nowhere compared to merely doing them over and over again. This also works in Super Smash Bros since there is only 2 attack buttons (normal and special) as well as 4 directions.

6. Every Driving Game is Burnout
I didn’t used to be a fan of driving games and i still am not really although i’ve always liked the Burnout Series and later fell in love with Forza Horizon. However i’m not good at it because of a small problem, not only am i bad at all driving games i tend to attack opponents by instinct because of how long I’ve played the Burnout Series. I never tried to fix this problem though as i find it surprisingly amusing and at times it was also highly effective too. For example i managed to do a legitimate Burnout Style Takedown on an NPC in Forza Horizon and there’s alot of cases where i’ve turnt vehicles 180 degrees so they face the wrong way. I do get bored quickly though…

7. I’ve Played Horror Games Despite Hating Them
As a gamer i hate almost all horror games as the ones these days seem to think Jump-Shocks are all you need to make a game causing places like Steam Greenlight to be filled with absolute garbage and even among mainstream there’s a huge lack of good horror games (more reason why people were disappointed Silent Hills was canceled. Despite this i somehow end up playing them anyway, perhaps I secretly like it when my heart is racing as its a feeling that a fat lazy guy like me doesn’t experience often but I’ll never truly now. I end up playing these games incredibly slowly mostly due to getting tired of getting shocked over and over again and I’ll purposely remove any earphones/headphones if it seems obvious. You’ll never see me record any games like this at all even if you paid me loads of money. A horror game i found interesting (despite using Jump-Shocks) was on the Wii and you needed to use the WiiMote as a phone receiver, it also had an cool secret character you’d run into that’d caused you to get Red letters on the Wii Message Board which i thought was clever. I’d rather play an Action/Horror overall though. Note i say Jump-Shock on purpose because they are usually not scary at all, especially if you have the volume low.

And that’s about it
Thanks for reading this post, it took a surprisingly long time to write so sharing it to your twitter or something would be highly appreciated. Also note i can still take PayPal donations to (deleted the button because it stopped working).


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