My Reply to Watchmojo.com’s ‘Top 10 ridiculous Superhero powers’ video


I writ a reply to the above video that ended up so long i decided to post it here since it the original comment will probably disappear under the usual Youtube comments soon and i feel i put alot of work into it. Here you go:

“Ok, i’m going to try and go through the difficult task of going through all the Superheroes on this list (even the honorable mentions) and come up with reasons why they could be useful (with the right adjustments and better writers):

1. Madam Fatale – First of all disguises in stories are actually quite common and being a detective isn’t that special either so in order to make it better would be making the Parrot more important and useful.

2. Bouncing Boy – From what i saw in the video he really can’t bounce very high so that is one thing that could use an upgrade. Also he could use his power with actual tactics as just Bouncing is boring. Super Strength would probably be good as well.

3. Hindsight Lad – This guy wouldn’t make a good Superhero in the sense of having his own comic but he has amazing potential as a supporting character as thats where his power would work best. If he saw the Good guys get defeated by villains he could then tell them what they did wrong and possibly secure them the win next time they do battle.

4. Dog Welder – I’m not really sure i can do this guy any justice at all. To make him any good he’d have to be completely recycled.

5. The Thunderer – Maybe if they change the person who is the thunderer (like there are different versions of other characters) to someone more interesting. I would love to see a version of him throw someone really far by simply telling them to fuck off.

6. Zeitgeist – Another one i’m not so sure about. Maybe make him more agile, a major upgrade in the strength of the acid and maybe some power control (for instance it’d be cool if he could melt an opponents weapon by simply spitting on it before beating the shit out of them).

7. The Dazzler – If she has control over her power she could easily blind people with them. In fact she should be able to control the power of the light beams from simply lighting up a dark area to full on laser beams. Technology these days could easily counteract the problem of needing music to use her power too (or they could just scrap the need of it altogether but i’d rather it be kept).

8. Arm Fall Off Boy – There’s no real saving a joke character. Maybe a slight redesign so he doesn’t look so weird and possibly the ability to tranform his arm, also possibly being able to still use it while its deattached.

9. Matter Eater Lad – from what i see all he does is eat stuff that normal people can’t eat, maybe make his unusual diet affect his strength (he probably has a crazy amount of iron in his body after all). Also take Matter out of his name and just call him Eater Lad.

10. Doorman – This guy obviously has to be with other people to even be slightly useful. It would be cool if the heroes were outside a heavy fortified villains base that was essentially indestructible from the outside but then Doorman just happens to be there and makes it all pointless. His powers need a bit of an upgrade to, why not just make him overpowered and let him teleport people to anywhere he has been before/seen (therefore making his power at least a little bit more ‘super’).

11. Rainbow Girl – The concept of Rainbow Girls powers can be taken to a horribly dark place. If she could fully control emotions imagine if she could make the villains so depressed for no apparent reason that they kill themselves. That would be awesome but the costume would need a little redesign.

12. Tag – His powers would be cool depending on how they are used. Maybe he’d be improved if he was given a little bit of the dark treatment. Making people flock away from people he plans to assassinate and causing people to flock around people that are chasing him in order to make a quick getaway are interesting uses of that power.

13. Squirrel Girl – She doesn’t need fixing, from what i’ve seen and heard from outside this video alone she’s already weird and crazy enough.”

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